Educating the Bear

The library is offering some bear education. Are we educating the bears?? Well, as that might be a good course of action, it might be more productive not to try and educate the bears, as they seem to do their own thing and keep on learning how to open those doors. So let us offer some education to us humans who also like to ignore common sense and do our own thing which often leads into interesting situations.

Bears are fuzzy, adorable, but can be crazy terrifying. Bears of course, have been seen right here in our own backyards. And while your chances of being injured by a bear are approximately 1 in 2.7 million, according to the National Park Service, the thought of a bear in your yard can send shivers down the spine. What would bears be without bees? Ears!

The best solution we can offer? Make jokes! Herein, we've rounded up a few of the best bear puns that will help add a sense of levity. And if you're expecting them to be un-bear-able, well, you're prob-bear-ly right. What's a bears favorite shoe? They prefer to go bear foot!

To be a bit more serious, we do have to think in reality. So what to do when faced with a bear challenge? We offer some theories from some so called experts (not advice on our part). When a bear charges you, it's usually for one of two reasons.

One is Bluff charging. Bluff charges are the most common type as they are trying to scare or intimidate you. Its head and ears will be facing forward and up. A bears will puff itself up to look bigger, move in big, bounding leaps toward you, but will stop short or veer off at the last minute. It may make loud noises afterward.

If you think a bluff charge is about to happen, make yourself big, wave your arms, and talk calmly to the bear. When the bear starts charging, stand your ground and stay calm. When the bear finishes charging, back away slowly while talking to the bear calmly. You want to let it know that you're human.

Never run away when a bear is bluff charging since it may trigger an attack. However, you should be prepared to defend yourself in case the attack isn't a bluff and the bear turns aggressive. What do you call a bear without any teeth? A gummy bear!

Then there is Aggressive charging. A bear who is aggressively charging is very dangerous. Signs of an impending aggressive charge include: pounding front paws on the ground, huffing, yawning or clacking their teeth, head down and ears pointed back, or running straight at you, full-speed. Do not run. Running can "activate" the bear, making them think you are prey.

If you see these signs, prepare to defend yourself. This is where the bear safety rhyme has some merit. Ever hear the color-coded aphorism about how to behave during a bear encounter: “If it's black, fight back; if it's brown, lie down; if it's white, say good night – (which is to say, if you have some sort of an encounter with a polar bear, you’re probably a goner)?

Although the bear safety rhyme sounds like good advice, you have to know why a bear is attacking you before you can decide the best way to respond. If a black bear attacks you, according to the saying - fight back. Don't play dead. Punch and kick at the bear's face. Use weapons such as rocks, sticks, or bear spray.

If a brown bear or also known as a grizzly bear, attacks you, get on the ground immediately, play dead. Don't fight back as that makes the attack worse. Cover your head with your hands and leave your backpack on to help protect yourself. Lie flat on your stomach with your legs outspread keeping your elbows on the ground to keep the bear from rolling you over and exposing your stomach. As difficult as it may be, don't make any noise and be as still as possible. You want to convince the bear you're not a threat. Resistance will provoke the bear. Hopefully, the bear will see you’re immobilized and go away.

If the bear quits attacking you, continue to lie still for several minutes in case it's still in the area. Don't move until you're sure the bear is gone. If the bear continues to attack you, you may have no choice but to fight back. If you have to fight, fight it as hard as you can with any weapons you can find.

Unlike brown and black bears, polar bears rarely bluff charge. If a polar bear is charging you, be ready to defend yourself and fight it off. Try to hit it in any sensitive areas such as the face, eyes, and nose. Fortunately, we don’t see many around here. Why did the bear need to take a break? He just likes to paws and reflect sometimes!

Remember - a bear-on-human attack is less frequent than a lightning strike. Bears can be anywhere. Assume their presence. Avoiding a conflict is easier than dealing with one.

The bottom line - you need to be aware of your surroundings. That means always keeping an eye on the area around you, keeping your dog leashed and being on the lookout for animal carcasses, which a bear could be protecting as a food source.

Always keep a safe distance from wildlife. Never intentionally get close to a bear. Stay alert and look for bear activity, especially where visibility or hearing is limited. NO delay to take a selfie or video.

Always carry Bear spray, a stronger version of pepper spray. But having it buried in your backpack isn’t really helpful if you suddenly encounter a charging bear. Keep it within reach, and know how to use it, especially if you can’t see beyond about 40 feet.

Try to travel and hike in groups of two to five. Groups of people are usually noisier and less likely to surprise bears. Most importantly, if you see a bear from a distance, detour as much as possible. Do not try to get closer to take a picture. Anyone moving quickly (i.e., mountain biker, trail runner) is at a higher risk of surprising a bear.

If the bear sees you, move slowly. If you happen upon a bear at close range − especially a mom with cubs − don’t make sudden movements. Back away slowly, while observing behavior. If it’s huffing and puffing, waving its claws or pawing at the ground, those are all signs of aggression. It’s warning you and once again forget about taking that picture or video of the encounter.

But what can we do to be safe around your home? Do not litter or leave food out, especially when you’re hiking or camping. Food and garbage are the No. 1 attractants to a bear.

Upgrade your trash can to bear resistant. This is an investment in both your safety and the wildlife surrounding you. Clean your grill after every use. After using the grill, put it in your garage or a place that a bear cannot get to it. If cooking over an open fire, remove any unburned food or scraps from the fire pit.

Remove bird feeders when bears are most active, mid- March to mid-November. At a minimum, make feeders unavailable by hanging them at least 10 feet from the ground and four feet from any supporting post or tree trunk.

Keep your lawn mowed and weeded. Grasses, dandelions and clover are natural bear foods. Keep the landscape open in the area surrounding your house.

Consider electric fencing if you have a garden. Vegetable gardens, especially those containing potatoes and root vegetables such as carrots and beets, attract bears. Flower gardens are not as attractive to bears as long as they don’t contain sweet vetch, dandelions or clover. Never use blood meal as a fertilizer or deer repellent in any type of garden.

Don’t leave pets unattended outside at night or when a bear is known to be in the area. Store pet food inside. Consider feeding pets (and livestock) at midday so they are finished eating before dusk. Bring pet food bowls inside as soon as pets are finished eating. Don’t leave bones and scented chew toys laying around your yard.

What did the bear say when he fell down the stairs? "Oh, how embearassing!"

Bear safety is mainly proactive. The best way to stay safe around bears is to proactively avoid negative bear encounters whether on the trail or around home.