Mosquitoes

I have read ways in which mosquitoes are beneficial to the environment but I don’t know anyone who actually likes them. The one good thing is, they are fragile. Suppose they were like beetles and had a hard carapace so a simple slap wouldn’t finish them off? What’s also annoying is what they do to us psychologically. After a bite we all get twitchy. We feel a faint sensation on our skin and instinctively slap ourselves. Then we’re annoyed all over again when we realize there was nothing there and we’ve slapped ourselves for no good reason.

Someone says something we find particularly annoying. If we haven’t learned to keep our big mouths shut we slap at the annoyance but, if we think about it we realize our feelings came from our dislike of someone else they reminded us of. We suffer from an instinctive desire to respond that has nothing to do with the person we’re talking to. By the time we reach maturity we’ve hopefully learned not to transfer our dislikes onto other people.

When I was a boy it was popular to be told we should count to ten before responding to what someone says that causes us to feel anger. I think that’s still good advice although I don’t think I’ve ever made it all the way to ten. On the other hand, simply being silent usually sends a far more meaningful message than our words ever can. Being around children again reminds me of how often one little word gets an equal or stronger reply which rapidly leads to a full blown argument.

The culprit in such exchanges is our old nemesis, our ego. No matter how many years go by we still have a tendency to instantly defend ourselves when we feel slighted by someone else. That instinct is what media thrives on. If they can get an emotional response from their audience it really doesn’t matter whether that response is positive or negative.

Sales people know this very well. If you try to sell someone something the best answer is, of course, “yes”. The second best response is “No way. Get out of here.” The worst response possible is a shrug of disinterest. The negative response means the person is emotionally involved in what you’ve said. That gives you the opportunity to get another response and, hopefully, find out why they had such a negative reaction. Once you get them talking you can make the sale. Indifference is deadly.

I once had a man who told me in rather rude terms to get out of his business. He had no desire to see me or hear what I had to say. I nodded, “Okay, see you next month.”

His jaw dropped and, after a pause, he said, “You would, wouldn’t you?”

I assured him I’d be back every month until we talked about how my product could help him. He became one of my very best customers.

It’s best to hesitate before slapping.